"Back-to-school shopping is nothing new, but sharing what you’ve purchased on social media is a relatively new phenomenon that’s becoming more popular than ever among kids and teens. If you search TikTok for #backtoschool2024, you’ll see over 47,000 videos of tweens and teens posting their “hauls” for the upcoming school year. The videos are also popular on YouTube and seem to follow a similar structure. Kids start by showcasing the numerous bags from all the places they’ve shopped before detailing the different items they’ve purchased. Many stop to express gratitude for what they’ve been able to buy before diving into the haul.
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And more and more kids and teens with follower counts, big and small, are posting. Compared to #backtoschool2023’s 30,500 videos, there’s been a 55 percent increase in the number of teens posting about their new gear and clothes for this upcoming school year.
What’s behind this trend? Are these hauls realistic, and how does watching these hauls affect other kids? We had two experts and a parent of five weigh in on this trend with advice for how to tackle conversations about hauls, overconsumption, and social media with your kids.
Rachael M. Jones, LMFT, PMH-C
Rachael M. Jones is a licensed marriage and family therapist and co-owner of Trailhead Therapy in the Chicagoland area. She earned her master’s degree at Purdue University and holds certifications in perinatal mental health (PMH-C), Gottman Method Levels 1 and 2, and SafeZone allyship. Her approach is centered on relational dynamics, values-based decision-making, and balancing connection with individuality, offering evidence-based, collaborative care tailored to each client’s needs.
Kendall Meade
Kendall Meade is a Certified Financial Planner and Certified Financial Therapist-Level 1 with SoFi based in Charleston, SC. She spends her time working with members one-on-one, leading financial education events, and engaging with the media on personal finance topics.
Why are kids posting back-to-school hauls?
Rachael M. Jones, a licensed marriage and family therapist and co-owner of Trailhead Therapy, says the desire to fit in with peers is a big reason behind why teens are posting these videos.
“The need to feel safe and secure is a driving force for a lot of actions and decisions,” she says. “It’s not as much about the attention for a lot of kids and more about fitting in and feeling like they belong.”
If you watch any number of these shopping hauls, you’ll see that the brands and items mentioned from video to video are shockingly similar.
Casey Lewis is a journalist who writes a popular newsletter about Gen Z and Gen A trends called After School. She notes in her most recent newsletter that brands like PacSun, Brandy Melville, and Altar’d State stand out as some of the most popular among teens this year.
It’s no surprise that these hauls feature similar things, says Jones. “Knowing what’s cool and acceptable and matching those trends helps kids feel confident and protected as they walk into the first day of school,” she says.
Beyond using haul videos to get validation and positive affirmations for heading back to school, Jones also points to the fact that so many teens relied on social media during COVID to build their identity and maintain relationships and that this hasn’t stopped even though kids are back in school in person.
“So many of these kids had fundamental parts of their school experience taken or changed by COVID,” she says. “They’re trying to figure out what going to school, fitting in, and making an impression looks like.”
Back-to-school hauls aren’t always realistic
The National Retail Foundation (NRF) estimates that families will spend an average of just under $875 on back-to-school purchases this year. It’s an estimated $15 less per family than last year but still the second-highest total amount since the survey launch. That’s a lot, and Kendall Meade, a Certified Financial Planner with SoFi, says, “For many families, this may not be affordable.”
Teens often show off 10+ bags from expensive brands in their videos and make a point of talking about how much stuff is in their haul. That’s unrealistic for most kids. This can be a problem if peers are watching these hauls to validate that they’ve got the right things to fit in at school, and problematic for parents who don’t want to or can’t afford to match what kids are buying in the hauls.
Jasmine Bloemhof is a mom of five and a publicist living in Rancho Palos Verdes, California—an affluent area of Los Angeles—and says that she noticed that her kids had much stronger opinions this year on what brands to shop and even what malls to go to. She says her teens “went bonkers” (within their allocated budget) in some of the most popular stores from the hauls, like Sephora, PacSun, and Tilly’s, and that she was surprised that her 11-year-old was adamant about spending some of her back to school budget on a Stanley cup.
“Trends like #backtoschoolhauls,” she thinks, “are creating this constant cycle of chasing ‘stuff’ that just never ends for our kids, and it puts pressure on parents to overspend in response to ‘keeping up with the Joneses.’”
“Trends like #backtoschoolhauls are creating this constant cycle of chasing ‘stuff’ that just never ends for our kids, and it puts pressure on parents to overspend.”
She says she wants her kids to focus on getting things that personally appeal to them but that the pressure coming from social media and things like haul videos are making it hard to do this as teens spend more and more time comparing what they have to their peers on social media.
Jones agrees that for most kids these haul videos aren’t realistic and that watching too many of them can have negative consequences for teens. “We know that heavy social media use has been linked to increased risk of anxiety, depression, impaired relational skills, low self-worth, poor body image, and a host of other concerns,” she says.
Heavy social media use can make it hard for teens to develop their own identities and values because they’re being flooded with so many opinions.
How to approach hauls with your kids and teens
What can you do as a parent if your kid is feeling the effects of watching videos of back-to-school shopping hauls or if you’re trying to reduce your teen’s social media scrolling? Here are four tips from our experts on how to navigate with your teen:
1. Validate their feelings
Jones says one of the most important things that parents can do is to listen and empathize with their teen. The goal of the conversation, she says, shouldn’t be to try to persuade anyone to do something different but says that having both sides share their feelings can really help.
“Many parents feel that sticking to rules means they can’t validate their child’s feelings, or that validating feelings requires changing the rules,” she says, but notes that this isn’t true. She recommends parents acknowledge the feelings their teen might be having while also reiterating that the decision that the budget for shopping or social media usage won’t change.
Jones also says that if families can swing it, letting teens buy one trendy item “can serve as a balanced compromise” to doing a full haul.
2. Set a budget and talk to your teen about it
Meade says it’s important to be up-front with your kids early on about what type of budget they’ll have for back-to-school shopping. She says it’s important for parents to set realistic expectations about what they’re able and willing to spend and that it can be helpful for parents to offer alternative solutions for teens looking to have more money to spend on back-to-school shopping. “Maybe your teen can get a part-time job mowing lawns, babysitting, or dog walking to earn money to buy items that they may want but are not necessities,” she says.
Bloemhof says she has each of her kids go through their closets to determine what they actually need each year and has a conversation about what their budget will be before they go shopping. She says that really helped her kids focus in on a few key items that they wanted before leaving the house, which made shopping easier.
3. Help give your teen the reassurance they’re looking for without using social media
Jones says she often will recommend alternate ways for teens to get the positive affirmation they’re craving that don’t use social media. In her sessions with parents, Jones says, “We talk about how we can address kids’ needs and values while adhering to parents’ needs and boundaries.”
Some of her recommendations include things like having teens send pictures of their shopping to family members or FaceTiming with friends while they’re shopping to get positive reinforcement.
She says that having your teen plan out their first-day outfit with their friends can also be helpful in giving them reassurance and that this can really help foster a sense of belonging that teens crave.
4. Shop secondhand for trendy items
Both Meade and Jones are big fans of encouraging teens to shop secondhand for specific brands that are popular. “A lot of teens are really into brand names, but they can be ridiculously expensive,” says Meade. “Buying them secondhand can save a lot of money.” She recommends online sites like Facebook Marketplace or Poshmark as great places to look or try to find a local consignment shop to visit.
Shopping secondhand, says Jones, can help fulfill the desire to have trendy items to help a teen feel like they fit in when there isn’t a budget for new items and is a good strategy for parents to recommend as an alternative to a large shopping spree.
Final thoughts on back-to-school hauls
Heading back to school can bring up feelings ranging from excitement, fear, insecurity, and anxiety. Posting a #backtoschool2024 haul is a trend teens are using to get validation from peers before the first day, but these hauls are unrealistic and can cause negative effects for teens.
Exploring strategies like the above can help give teens an important confidence boost without blowing the budget or social media.
Elliott Harrell
Elliott is a mom of two little girls and is based in Raleigh, NC. She spends her days running a sales team and doing laundry and her nights writing about the things that she loves. She’s passionate about all things motherhood and women’s health. When she’s not working, writing or parenting you can find her trying a new restaurant in town or working on her latest needlepoint project.