"Recently, it hit me that my husband and I will be empty nesters in just two years. I was overwhelmed by a tidal wave of emotions at this realization. I wanted to feel excited—it’s been a long time since my own life revolved around me. But instead, I was overcome by sadness, fear, doubt, and uncertainty. Because the truth is, I can barely remember what my life was like before becoming a mom.
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As parents, we become so immersed in our children’s lives that we sometimes forget about our own. This can leave us feeling lost and confused as our children become more independent.
Dealing with so many heavy emotions got me thinking about the steps I want to take toward rediscovering myself and focusing on certain aspects of my life that I’ve put aside over the years. Here are a few ways I’m recommitting to myself, and making early preparation for the empty nest transition.
Getting to Know My Partner Again
As our daughter becomes more independent, my husband and I are beginning to focus on rediscovering one another. Regular date nights, camping trips, and early morning hikes are just a few ways that we’re beginning to bond and enhance our relationship. Spending extra time with each other has really given us a chance to reconnect, and has allowed us to revisit special activities that we once enjoyed before parenthood.
I’ll always cherish my role as a mom—but I must say, reprioritizing my role as a wife has been quite refreshing. In a strange way, it sort of feels as though I’m dating my partner all over again.
Focusing On Friendships, Both Old and New
Since becoming a parent, I’ve had a few friendships take a hit over the years. As our priorities and commitments change throughout life, so do our relationships…and that’s OK. One of the benefits of watching my daughter grow up is that I have more space in my life for rekindling old friendships and embracing new ones.
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Rediscovering Old Passions
Just like old friendships, sometimes we have to leave behind personal interests and hobbies as our commitments change throughout life.
Now that certain aspects of my life require less focus and attention, I’ve been able to recommit to old passions, such as my love for writing. I started small by journaling on a daily basis, which really helped me to reconnect with myself.
The thought of being an empty nester is frightening for many women—mainly because we fear that we can’t lead fulfilling lives without our children. Reconnecting with my passion for writing has not only given me an added sense of purpose but it’s been fun and uplifting as well!
As parents, we’re all helping our teenagers find their place in this world. But I’m also finding my place and by seeking enjoyment in things other than motherhood, I’m becoming more intentional about owning my happiness.
Relishing the Present Moment
Instead of dwelling on the past, or dreading what’s to come, I’ve decided to embrace what’s happening now. As a mom, I want to soak up these precious moments that will soon become memories. Being more mindful about living in the present is really giving me a better perspective.
Seasons change. Our children get older, and so do we—that’s life. But even though change is scary, I’m learning that it can also be a beautiful thing. Yes, I’ll be an empty nester in two years—and that’s OK. Because when one chapter ends, another beautiful chapter begins! And, who knows, maybe in the next chapter I’ll get to focus a little more on me.
