This post is sponsored by Pampers but all of the opinions within are those of The Everymom editorial board. We only recommend products we genuinely love.
"One of my kid-free friends recently asked me if potty training is really as bad as people say. My response? “I’d rather give birth unmedicated again than redo my first kid’s potty training experience.” OK, yes, I’ll admit I am prone to dramatics. In all seriousness, toilet training my first kid did not go as I expected. But at least it made me learn what works and what doesn’t.
When my son turned 2, I did everything to encourage his natural interest in the toilet. We bought books, role-played with toys, and even let him accompany Mom and Dad to the bathroom (the weird things you do as a parent, IYKYK). Well-meaning family members would comment that he seemed like he was ready, but I wasn’t fully convinced. Regardless of my intuition, I decided to give it a shot during a holiday break when he was almost 2.5.
Truth be told, I didn’t have the energy to research the plethora of training methods out there as a full-time working mom of two, so I bought a popular potty training course on a whim (sigh, the lures of IG parenting). The course followed the three-day bare-bottom method as bible, and I became a faithful disciple. I printed all the resources, bought all the things, and instructed everyone involved how to follow along. After seven days of watching my toddler run circles around our house to avoid the potty like the plague, I threw in the towel. He was not ready. He wouldn’t be until his third birthday, and even then, it took weeks of persuasion. Now it’s my second kid’s turn to potty train—here’s what we’re doing differently for this next round:
Reducing the pressure by using training pants
Since the initial approach I was following required nudity, training pants during the daytime were a big no-no. But I think that the immediate switch from diapers to nothing inadvertently made him resist the change even more. He spent days absolutely terrified of experiencing accidents, regardless of how much we reassured him. He was also scared of going in the potty, even though we had been role-playing with it for months. All this led to him purposefully withholding to the point of concern and our eventual decision to forgo toileting altogether.
On our next go-around, we allowed him to use training pants during the day and slowly transitioned to undies. This seemed to work far better for him, so I’m doing the same with his sister now. We introduced training pants (Pampers Easy Ups) right before she hit 2.5. Does she have accidents? Sure, but she also has zero apprehension about using the potty. And we’re not constantly cleaning our floors because accidents are neatly contained in her Easy Ups. In fact, they’re absorbent enough to use through the night, but they still feel way more similar to undies than other trainers. Since making the switch, she’s started to sense her body cues more effectively, too.
Most importantly, she gets so excited to use them because of the adorable Bluey designs—an excitement that was clearly missing the last time we did this. We’ve tried a lot of training pants in the past, but we keep coming back to Easy Ups because of how much she loves them (and how affordable they are in comparison to other brands). She can also easily push them down and pull them back up, a necessary skill she’s getting plenty of practice with before we make the full switch to undies. We haven’t purchased diapers in over a month, and I have high hopes that we won’t have to ever again.
Pampers
Choose from fun Bluey and My Little Pony designs to help build excitement for your little one. Avaiable in sizes 2T-3T to 5T-6T, conveniently find your kids’ perfect fit online now!
Pampers
We use these gentle wipes for quick accident clean ups and after every potty use. The textured cloth helps grip the mess way better than other wipes I’ve used.
Following a training method that fits my kid’s personality
I’m sure you’re thinking this is about to be a hit piece on the three-day toileting approach, but I swear it’s not. This method’s goal is for toddlers to connect the “feeling” of going and the need to sit on the toilet. Research shows that allowing them to experience accidents by going nude is an effective way to do this. Ultimately, the overall premise did work for my son. While it was not accomplished in three days, we did let him experience accidents to help make that connection. He’s been fully trained for over a year and hasn’t had any regressions (knock on wood).
However, I wasn’t taking his personality into account when I started this process. My son does things on his terms and needs to feel in charge of every situation (classic Leo behavior, lol). I should’ve known that forcing him out of his diaper and onto the toilet from one day to another would cause pushback. Add in the pressure of accomplishing this in a weekend, and it was enough to send us all over the edge.
A more gradual approach
My daughter has grown up seeing her brother use the potty and started daycare at a younger age than him, so she sees other kids use it, too. She’s had much more exposure than he did at her age and has more of a “go with the flow” personality. Instead of rushing into a bare-bottom weekend, we’ve taken a much slower pace with toileting. We brought the potty out in their playroom when she turned 2, and she even used it a few times before we officially started training. Since starting the training pants phase, she’s had fewer and fewer accidents each week. I’ll likely fully transition to undies when she’s closer to 3. This gradual method suits her personality, makes potty training feel fun and natural, and doesn’t make me want to pull my hair out.
“This gradual method suits her personality, makes potty training feel fun and natural, and doesn’t make me want to pull my hair out.”
Readjusting my own expectations for potty training
Looking back, I realize my expectations were far too narrow the first time we tried toileting. I was set on having the exact results I had conjured up in my mind. Honestly, I fall into this trap the most as a parent because kids pretty much never do what you expect them to, and that’s OK. It was unfair of me to put that on my son back then, and it’s something I’ve corrected since. I feel way less pressure about potty training with my second kid because I know it’ll eventually happen. I trust that she’ll get there when she’s ready, and I’ll continue providing her with support and guidance in the meantime.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Steph Alleva Cornell, Branded Content Editor
Since becoming a young mama in 2020, Steph has found joy in creating beautiful yet relatable content surrounding the raw realities of motherhood. She believes showcasing both the wonders and struggles of being a parent helps other mothers understand that they are not alone in their journey.
This post is sponsored by Pampers but all of the opinions within are those of The Everymom editorial board. We only recommend products we genuinely love.