"Have you ever walked into Target—or any store—and noticed items out of place? My initial thought usually falls along the lines of ‘looks like someone was being lazy, and they didn’t take the time to put it back.’ But what if there is an underlying reason as to why it was abandoned midway through a shopping trip? The very reason might be related to a mom who had to prioritize her child before herself.
There is a heartwarming TikTok trend inspiring acts of kindness in the aisles of our beloved Target stores and beyond. TikTokers have labeled this act of kindness as ‘she deserved the purse.’ While it can be confusing at first, the meaning behind this phrase is powerful, especially for fellow mothers.
The viral TikTok video inspiring acts of kindness
The initial video comes from Denaesha Gonzalez (@denaeshagonzalez). Her viral video has currently garnered over 21 million views and 4 million likes and has been forwarded over 144k times.
The video is a single shot with an abandoned $20 envelope clutch from Target nestled in the middle of shelves filled with baby items. The items surrounding this clutch: Infant Tylenol, baby shampoo, diaper paste, and a Frida Baby Breathe Easy Kit. The 17-second video is short, but it’s heavy with a lot of meaning behind it.
What may seem like a misplaced item is a gesture of a mother who gave up something in order to afford something for her child.
Why ‘she deserved the purse’ is significant
So, why is this viral video significant? Motherhood is often labeled as rewarding, but it also comes with a lot of sacrifices. As a mother, I, too, have abandoned an item I chose for myself to prioritize a need for my child. And while I admit, I’m fortunate enough to afford a splurge here and there, some mothers are not. Putting the $20 clutch back could mean being able to afford medicine to treat a fever, being able to feed your baby formula, or being able to provide diapers for the week.
“Motherhood is often labeled as rewarding, but it also comes with a lot of sacrifices.”
It’s reported in recent years that, on average, a family spends $840 on diapers in one year for a single child. For formula? It depends on how much your baby consumes, but it can range anywhere between $800 to almost $3,000 a year. Simply said—having a family is expensive.
With Gonzalez’s post, it’s shed a light on what mothers will do to put their child before themselves. Thousands of comments poured in from people weighing in on their own experiences. Some want to give back, too.
“Crying cause it’s so much more [than] a purse, it’s a representation of all our sacrifices🥹”—@giannabrielle03
“I haven’t had my hair done in years. my nails done in years. my clothes come from Walmart. we can’t afford childcare. but my babies have what they need. one day, I’ll have the purse, just not today.❤️”—@ak47thomas
“The sacrifices of a mother. I really felt this.”—@pearlescent92
“Crying Because at some point we’ve all been her 😭”—@lifewithezra
The viral responses to ‘she deserved the purse’
People are so moved by ‘she deserved the purse.’ The public has ultimately made it into a campaign. It has become where people hide money in baby items throughout a store. This allows moms to “buy the purse” or whatever item they want for themselves.
Paying it forward
One viral video comes from @tabithaswatosh, where she spread her own money throughout her local Target store. Her video has over 9 million likes, over 39k comments, and has been saved over 305k times.
@tabithaswatosh’s viral video starts with her in the car with the text overlay, “She deserved the purse.” It then features the same Target aisle filled with baby items from Gonzalez’s video. What follows is @tabithaswatosh leaving the same amount of money as the $20 envelope clutch in a box of Huggies diapers. She puts money in the lid of an Enfamil Gentlease formula, other various formula cans, a box of training pull-ups, a Frida Breathe Easy kit, and a box of sensitive skin baby wipes. Once done, @tabithaswatosh is seen back in her car buckling herself in, and the video ends.
Remembering how hard it was
Another viral video by Julia Knapp (@julieknapppp) has gained insight as to why “she deserved the purse” is meaningful. Knapp’s viral video has been watched over 1.3 million times, has over 84k likes, and has been saved by almost 3,000 people.
Knapp opens the video by directly talking to the camera and says, “I am not as big of a creator as some of the folks that are doing this online. But it moved me so much because I became a mom at 19, and I remember digging through my car for change to try to buy diapers. You moms deserve the world, and it’s so hard being a parent in these days, and I just want to pay it forward. So, I’m going to go do that today.”
The video then shows Knapp walking into a store to a cash register. The cashier asks, “For how much?” Knapp responds with “ten” for $10. Knapp documents that she bought a “Price Cutter” gift card with the text “The Gift of Groceries” on it. Knapp wraps her gift card in a handwritten note and places them under a pack of diapers.
It then pans to Knapp in her car saying, “I was encouraged to do that after seeing that TikTok (referring to Gonzalez’s and @abbeyfickley’s video) this morning… and you don’t have to be a content creator to do this. Go out in your local community and give back. It’s the best feeling, and just knowing that one mom is going to be a little stressed out, makes it all worth it.”
Other responses to ‘she deserved the purse’
Videos from @tabithaswatosh and Julia Knapp have people feeling a certain way about ‘she deserved the purse,’ and they’re good feelings based on the comments. The ones most notable come from moms themselves.
“I’ve actually found this one time in a store by me, I was on WIC could barely afford groceries and when we got formula we found $100 with it. The stress that was lifted knowing we were eating that day”—@dbird1880
“Literally sobbing. I couldn’t afford half these things when I had a baby at 19. You are wonderful.”—@ivyxoxo3.
“Omg this trend makes me sob. I’ve been wanting a certain target purse for two months and a one week ago I was finally ganna have enough to get it, & I decided to get my son a toy and clothes instead”—@http.ashleyy._
“I emptied my wallet last night for formula. Had $2 more than a realized – so I was able to get the formula and a pop for myself after a long day at work. Moms are the best.”—@Tas
People are reflecting on their own moms
“I love this so much my mom struggled so much raising my sister and I and now we have enough to give back to other people seeing you do this makes me tear up I love you so much❤️(1)”—@kperezperez20
“I remember my siblings and I digging through every place in the house and car to scrounge up loose change so mom could put gas in the van so we could go to school. My parents sacrificed so much❤️”—mental.health.mad
People have been moved by ‘she deserved the purse’
“Ma’am, you’ll never know the amount of days you made and how many moms will view this as a sign to keep going. Thank you 🫶”—@alexaagump
“This is beautiful! I hope it helps some mums out there ❤️🩹”—@heyheidi030
“she deserved the purse but she loves her baby more than herself. It’s what true moms do! Anything for our kids”—@dakruk16
“I don’t have much but like $8 and I’m going to leave it at my target 😭✨”—@97rianna
The movement spreads awareness of the real cost of raising a child
“Thank you for putting it in the cheapest ones. We [often] get the cheapest brand and this is so great vs an expensive box”—@book.lover20246
“As a pregnant women I appreciate this so much, I don’t think people know how hard it can be and how expensive things are 🙏🏻❤️”—@sandrawallener
“I never knew diapers were not affordable. I’m not a mom so I wouldn’t know and I thank you for informing us and thank you mom. Thank you all moms!! Wow, what incredible people!! Moms! 🥰”—@cbgb520
Final thoughts
The next time I stumble upon a misplaced item in a store, I’m going to think about the mom, dad, or other caregiver who may have sacrificed something for themselves that day. They also make me hopeful that somewhere out there, there’s a mom who finally ‘gets the purse’ she deserves.
Patty Schepel, Editorial Intern
As the editorial intern, Patty works with The Everymom’s team on pitches, creating original articles, updating existing content, photo sourcing, writing shopping product descriptions, inputting freelance articles, and more. When she’s not working, you can find her spending time with her family, training for half marathons—she ran one 16 weeks pregnant—traveling, cooking, reading a rom-com, and keeping her sourdough starter, Rose, alive.