Making friends as an adult—especially as a mom—can feel surprisingly hard. Between busy schedules, social anxiety, and the need to feel “on” at in-person events, many women are turning to a new approach called soft socializing. The trend focuses on low-pressure activities—like classes, hobbies, or group events—where conversation happens naturally rather than being forced, making it easier to connect and build friendships.
I unknowingly tried soft socializing last year when I took a deep breath, put on my big girl undies, and walked into a mahjong lesson by myself. I’m an introvert, and the idea of going somewhere alone where I’d have to make small talk makes me hyper uncomfortable. But two things compelled me to go that night: I really wanted to learn how to play mahjong, and I knew I could get by just talking about the game if I didn’t vibe with anyone. In other words, I had a built-in security blanket—and it was the only reason I actually made it to the lesson.
The verdict after my first soft socializing event? I had a fun night, learned something, and even had a couple of conversations. I didn’t leave with any new friends, but I didn’t leave exhausted from trying to think of things to say or worried that I’d made a bad impression. The experience also gave me the confidence to keep showing up to mahjong events, where I have made new friends in the past year.
Keep reading to learn what soft socializing is, why it’s becoming so popular, and simple ways to try it if you’re hoping to make friends as an adult.
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Why is making friends hard when you’re an adult?
“[Because of technology,] we’re more digitally connected but less socially practiced,” Francesca Emma, LMHC, says of the difference in today’s world vs 20 or 30 years ago. “Many people feel rusty initiating plans, tolerating awkwardness, or building new relationships outside of school or work.”
That can make it intimidating to go to social events, as many people feel like there’s a pressure to ‘perform’ when they’re there, leading to social anxiety and making it harder to make friends.
Francesca Emma, LMHC
Francesca Emma is a New York-based licensed mental health counselor, millennial therapist, and mom. Since 2010, she’s helped people break free from anxiety, disordered eating, and body image struggles.
In a recent trend report, Eventbrite found that 58% of respondents prefer events where socializing isn’t the main focus.
“That doesn’t mean people want to opt out of gathering altogether,” explains Rudi Greenberg, Eventbrite Head of Curation and Trends. “It just means they don’t want to feel ‘on’ from the moment they arrive to the moment they leave.”
Enter soft socializing, where the social event is geared toward a shared interest.
“When there’s a built-in activity, it reduces social anxiety because the focus isn’t solely on conversation,” says Emma. “The activity becomes a buffer, and that shared experience naturally creates micro-moments of bonding, which is how friendships actually begin.”
“When there’s a built-in activity, it reduces social anxiety…that shared experience naturally creates micro-moments of bonding.”
Greenberg says that soft socializing started rising in popularity on Eventbrite a few years ago and really took off in 2025. He points to the fact that when there’s a shared activity, a connection can happen more naturally, and that there’s been a large increase in demand for these types of events on the platform.
Soft socializing makes total sense to me. I have turned down invites in the past, even though I wanted to make new friends, because the anxiety I felt was too overwhelming. But if there’s a shared interest to fall back on, I know I’ll be OK. I also know that everyone at the event is there because they like or have an interest in the same thing, which builds a feeling of solidarity.
If you’ve stressed about how to put yourself out there, here are some ideas for great ways to use soft socializing as a way to connect with others and as a way to make new friends.
Find a mahjong lesson
I’m biased, but this four-person game is a great way to meet new people and find connections. As mahjong’s popularity has increased over the past couple of years, searching Eventbrite for mahjong nights or Google for mahjong groups in your city is a great way to do some soft socializing.
Try adult ballet classes
Adult ballet classes have become popular in recent years, for both women who took classes when they were younger and women who want to try something new. It’s also never too late to get back to figure skating, gymnastics, horseback riding, or other activities you loved as a kid. No matter what skill level you are, you’ll have a shared interest to talk about with the other people there.
Join a book club
Book clubs, where the group reads and discusses a chosen book, are a form of soft socializing. But a surprising type of book club is also growing in popularity: silent book club. Book lovers gather to read on their own, together at a specific location. In fact, the Eventbrite data showed that silent events, such as silent discos and book clubs, have seen a 9% increase.
Read More: Join The Everygirl Book Club here!
Pottery or painting classes
A friend of mine recently signed up for a pottery-making series of classes. It was a six-week commitment, so she saw the same people every time, but could always talk about a new project instead of making small talk. You could also look for a painting workshop or class series.
Flower arranging
Greenberg says flower-arranging classes have seen a big spike in popularity on Eventbrite. There are often one-off events you can attend, but longer series you can sign up for, too. As a bonus to meeting new people, you’ll walk away with beautiful flowers!
Stitching meet-ups
‘Grandma hobbies’ like needlepoint and embroidery are making a big comeback and are typically done as a solo activity. But there are ‘stitch ‘n bitch’ groups across the country where you can take your project to work on while others do the same. It’s a great way to get advice on your project as well as to meet new people.
Attend a silent disco
As the name suggests, silent discos don’t require any talking. You’ll wear headphones and dance it out in a group setting. If you take a break and want to chat with someone about the set that’s been playing, you can, but otherwise you can just bask in knowing it’s OK to be quiet.
Play pickleball or badminton
From 2022 through 2024, pickleball was the fastest-growing sport in the U.S, which means there’s a hefty number of folks interested in playing. It’s fun and easier to pick up than other racquet sports, like tennis or paddle. At many courts, players sign up and rotate onto a court, so you don’t have to worry about finding someone to play with. Once you play a game and rotate off the court, you can opt to chat with others waiting for a turn about the game.
Or, if you want to take it back to your middle school gym class, the racquet sport badminton has also been on the rise among millennials and Gen Z.
Volunteer for a school event
Sometimes the school PTO/PTA group gets a bad rap, but volunteering for an event at your child’s school counts as soft socializing: the shared interest is your kids. And whether you’re manning a game at the end of school carnival, building sets for the school play, or passing out popcorn at family movie night, all of these occasions offer low-pressure ways to meet other parents at school.
Elliott Harrell, Contributing Writer
Elliott is a mom of two little girls and is based in Raleigh, NC. She spends her days running a sales team and doing laundry and her nights writing about the things that she loves. She’s passionate about all things motherhood and women’s health. When she’s not working, writing, or parenting, you can find her trying a new restaurant in town or working on her latest needlepoint project.
