The One Thing I Do to Get Myself in the Mood

Confession time: I thought I was a woman who couldn’t get enough of sex, and then I tried to get pregnant. As one of the many women throughout history who have struggled with fertility, I am so done with it. If I never have to have sex again, I think I’d be OK (well probably not, but for now, I could wait until next year).

While I find the hormonal boost when you’re ovulating is helpful, it still doesn’t always kick in at the times my husband is available. So I’ve taken to one foolproof way to get myself in the mood: erotica.

 

I’ve taken to one foolproof way to get myself in the mood: erotica.

 

So “erotica” as a literary genre used to intimidate me until I realized most of the super steamy romances I’d read fit the bill: a story told with erotic undertones (and hopefully explicit moments). When I joined a book club, I learned so many others enjoyed these kinds of books, too.

 

Source: Elise Fox

 

One of my favorite shares was Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows; steamy and a mystery, it was a great combo. The overwhelming response from my fellow book clubbers was a good reminder of how much these stories can get someone in the mood.

So I started keeping erotica stashed under my bed for when I am wanting sex (which still happens sometimes!) or am needing a boost because I’m ovulating. I have sections earmarked that can get me in the mood really quickly, and it helps me when my brain is preoccupied with other things. 

 

I have sections earmarked that can get me in the mood really quickly, and it helps me when my brain is preoccupied with other things.

 

Then once, when my husband and I were on a long drive in the middle of my ovulation cycle, I was trying to figure out ways to keep the drive fun—and also keep us interested in sex until we got home. My attention span is similar to Dory the fish and I knew we needed to do something to keep sex in my brain. I get carsick so reading wasn’t an option. A thought started to worm its way into my brain, what if I listened to something instead? Added bonus, it might be fun to bring my husband in on this erotica secret. I tentatively asked if he’d be interested in listening to a romance novel. His enthusiastic response was all I needed and we listened to sexy words for hours. We got home and both of us got to it.

 

 

While most people are not going to listen to an eight-hour audiobook before trying to get it on (who has that kind of time?), I realized I could listen to snippets while doing other tasks, like cleaning the bathroom or making dinner, to help me ramp up on days I’m drained and my ovulation test is blinking its happy face. In that way, audio has been super helpful in blocking out the millions of racing thoughts taking over my brain.

One thing to note if you’re jumping into audio erotica: make sure you like the person’s voice you are listening to. If they do not sound sexy to you, or you have a reaction to them that’s not positive, it won’t work.

 

If audiobooks aren’t your thing, you can always fall back on an old-fashioned paperback. Here are a few to get you started.

 

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