Weâve all been there. You and your partner finally get a night alone. Thereâs the initial excitement of swapping your athleisure for a date night outfit or driving to a restaurant where they donât serve chicken fingers or juice boxes. The thrill of being escorted to a table that bears no remnants of last nightâs spaghetti dinner and where no one has set out crayons to entertain you. The ecstasy of everyone in the dining room using their inside voice and no one watching Paw Patrol on their iPhone. Giddy with freedom, you order drinks and toast to successfully getting out of the house⊠and then you spend the rest of the night talking about your family. Certainly there are things to talk about on date night that don’t the day-to-day stresses of life!
After one of these nights, itâs easy to drive home thinking, Wow, remember when we used to be fun and interesting? When we could talk for hours about a million different things? Is our relationship doomed now that we only talk about the family?
The good news is, no, youâre not doomed. During the years of active parenting, thereâs so much to do and so little time that itâs easy to fall into âhousekeepingâ mode when you have a moment alone with your partner. And, you love your family! Itâs OK to talk about them. It is, however, also important to talk about things that help you and your partner stay connected beyond your roles as a parenting team.
To get the ball rolling, we put together a list of over 40 date night questions to help you reconnect with and rediscover your partner.
40+ Things to Talk About on Date Night
The Appetizer: Fun Date Night Questions to Kick Things Off
A key ingredient of any good relationship is FUN. Being able to relax and laugh with your partner is important. If youâre looking to ease into things, here are some things to talk about on date night to keep the conversation light.
1. What was the first concert you went to? The best concert?
2. Whatâs your favorite memory? Earliest memory?
3. If you had to live in another country for a year, which one would you choose and why?
4. Which other era would you live in?
5. Whatâs your favorite memory of us dating?
6. Which three people would you invite to your dream dinner party?
7. Whatâs one thing youâre really good at?
8. Whatâs the best compliment youâve ever received?
9. Whatâs something youâre glad youâll never have to do again?
10. What was your first job? Worst job? Best job?
11. If you were famous, what would you want it to be for?
12. If you could be insanely talented at one thing, what would you choose?
13. What was your bedroom like as a teenager?
14. Whatâs the worst date youâve ever been on?
15. Whatâs the biggest trouble youâve ever been in?
The Main Course: Connect on an Even Deeper Level
Even if youâve been together for years, thereâs always more to learn about each other. Sometimes you just have to dig a little deeper or peel back some layers. These topics can help jumpstart more reflective conversations.
16. Whatâs the best thing you learned from your parents? The worst thing?
17. Whatâs the best advice youâve ever gotten? The worst advice?
18. Whatâs something youâve always wanted to try?
19. Whatâs the status of your friendships? Who do you consider to be your best friend?
20. What movie or book has had the most impact on you and why?
21. What would your current self tell your teenage self?
22. How could we improve our sex life?
23. If you had a spare $10,000 right now, what would you do with it?
24. What do you wish youâd known about money when you were younger?
25. What turns you on most?
26. What makes you feel overwhelmed?
27. Who do you most look up to?
28. Are there any parts of your life youâd do over?
29. Whatâs the most adventurous thing youâve ever done?
30. Whatâs something important that youâve changed your mind on?
31. If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?
32. Whatâs the most life-changing event youâve ever experienced?
The Dessert: Date Night Questions to Help You Dream Together
Relationships flourish where you have a shared vision of what a meaningful life together looks like. Here are some date night questions to help you dream about your future together.
33. If you had one piece of advice to live by, what would it be?
34. Whatâs your dream vacation?
35. Where do you want to retire?
36. Do you have any dreams or things that you want to accomplish that youâve put on the back burner? How can we bring them to life?
37. What excites you most about our future?
38. Whatâs your biggest fear about the future?
39. Whatâs one thing you still want to accomplish?
40. Is there anyone youâd want to switch lives with?
41. What do you want your legacy to be?
This is a starter list and not every date night question will resonate with you. Hopefully, though, theyâll spark ideas for even more that do. Relationships are a journey. They deserve our attention, just like we deserve to feel fun and interesting outside of our roles as parents. So go ahead, change the conversation. Youâll be glad you did.