Parents Dillon White and Suzanne White are social media superstars in the parenting space for their funny, heartfelt, and honest takes. The pair just had their fourth baby(!) and find themselves in the throes of newborn life once again. While late-night feedings, sibling adjustments, and newborn diapers might feel like old hat to these seasoned parents, dad Dillon recently shared a heartfelt piece of advice—new parent to new parent—that’s already racked up thousands of comments and views.
Recorded with tired eyes from under the snuggle of his new baby (try not to smile at the new baby sounds, BTW), he quietly gifts us with some wisdom especially poignant for new parents, new dads, and parents transitioning from one to two kids.
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His Heartfelt Advice for Parents in the Newborn Phase
“I don’t like giving out parenting advice because, let’s be real, none of us have any idea what we’re doing ever and everyone is different, but I will share the probably most helpful thing I learned as a parent,” he says. So first, he jokes, “Throw out all the clocks out the window, time means absolutely nothing anymore.”
Second, he starts to empathize with what so many new dads and new parents struggle with in those early newborn days. A baby creates a seismic shift in your life, and you won’t know exactly what to expect. But many dads say they feel helpless in those first months after the baby is born.
“The reality is for the first little while of a child’s life, a lot of them are going to cling to mom,” White says in the video.
White also shares that he felt helpless with his second baby and talked about his feelings with a friend at the time saying, “I want to be an equal parent in this, but the baby doesn’t see us as equal parents ‘cause it’s a baby and it doesn’t know what equal means.”
“I want to be an equal parent in this, but the baby doesn’t see us as equal parents ‘cause it’s a baby and it doesn’t know what equal means.”
He then shared his friend’s advice that was so, so good. “If your life circumstances are dictating that you’re not an equal parent right now… focus less on being an equal parent and more on being a majority partner.” (New moms, forward this to your partner ASAP!)
“Focus less on being an equal parent and more on being a majority partner.”
What does this mean? White suggests, “Literally, keep up with everything else.” All of your responsibilities and hers “because she doesn’t have the time or the energy to do it.”
Positive comments are rolling in with one user sharing, “That is amazing advice. Needs to be quoted and viral.” (We’re doing our part, @ashleywarner105!) “Perfection. I wish everyone had a partner who is this all-in,” wrote another commenter.
How to Get More Involved in the Newborn Phase
Others shared tips and advice in the comments about how to get dads more involved in the newborn phase, from handling bath time to taking full advantage of paternity leave. One of our Everydads recently shared similar advice for newborn fathers, “Get really good at one thing… Be the guy who labels, stores, and organizes mom’s milk. Take the Saturday overnight shift. Be the bath master.”
Final Thoughts from a Newborn Dad
Family transitions, whether going from zero to one child, one to two—or in Dillon and Suzanne White’s case, three to four kids—will always be a little rocky. But seasoned parents know everything is temporary. Even the baby’s preferences can shift. Many kids prefer one parent over the other at different stages, which can be tricky to navigate, too.
For those in the newborn phase right now, White offered some heartfelt closing thoughts in the video with a reminder of why this is all so important. The sweet, quiet moments with our babies are rare and fleeting. And we deserve to enjoy those moments.
So, if you’re expecting and want some encouragement or are in the newborn trenches right now, know that you’re not alone. Maybe you’ll find this when you’re snuggled up under your baby, too.
Kathy Sisson, Senior Editor
A mom of two, Kathy is passionately committed to sharing the honest, helpful—and often humorous—stories of motherhood, as she navigates her own everyday adventures of work, marriage, and parenting. She honed her creative and strategic skills at advertising agencies in Detroit and Chicago, before pivoting from marketing to editorial. Now instead of telling brand stories, she’s sharing her own, with articles published across popular parenting sites—including hundreds of stories on The Everymom.