I’ve always liked my name. It’s unique because it’s spelled differently than how you usually see it. But because of that, I’ve seen it written and pronounced in about a million different ways. If you can find a way to interpret the letters and sounds, I’ve probably seen or heard it over the last three-and-a-half decades.
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I’m used to it by now, but I’ve spent a lot of time in my life correcting how people say my name. Roll call on the first day of school often had the teacher (understandably) saying it wrong. I’d sit at my new desk and wonder what variation of the name I’d get during that class. About 50 percent of the time, I’d have to chime in and correct it.
My name is Brigette, pronounced how you would say Bridget, but without the “d” being in the spelling; it is often said in the French way, like “Bri-jeet,” year after year. Thankfully, mispronunciations are usually easy to clear up after the first correction.
Having a Common Name With a Unique Spelling
But correcting misspellings has been a much more tedious task throughout my life. I have letters, packages, prescriptions, memberships, accounts, and more under Bridgette, Bridget, Brigitte, Bridgett, Brigit, Brigett, and who even knows what else. Thankfully, my last name, Marshall, is easy to spell, so I can usually be tracked down even with the mismatch in spelling—but I spend a fair amount of time sorting out these logistics.
On important documents, I always need to double-check the accuracy of the spelling. You would think this wouldn’t be a problem when people are executing important paperwork, but it is startling how often slight misspellings happen even when exactness is crucial.
The most noticeable and aggravating errors are responses to my own emails, sent back with a misspelling—when my email address is my literal, exact name. I even include the automatic email signature on all messages for easy reference! I know this all sounds a bit whiny—there are much bigger problems to deal with in life—but the specifics of someone’s name is important, even if it’s a complicated one. (And there are obviously much more complicated names to say and spell than Brigette!)
Someone’s Name is Their Name—And That Matters
Brigette may not be the most common way to see the name spelled, but it’s what my parents purposely and carefully chose for me to be identified as and respond to throughout my life. I like that it’s slightly unique and was selected to look aesthetically pleasing when written out. I don’t mind correcting the pronunciation or the spelling the first time, but it is frustrating when someone gets it wrong time after time. It feels like they don’t care enough to remember something so fundamental about me.
A name is obviously very personal to someone. Outside of their personal significance, names are often also rooted in important cultural or familial traditions that deserve care and accuracy to show respect for people’s diverse backgrounds.
Why I Gave My Daughters Easy-to-Pronounce Names
I purposely went down a different route and gave my two daughters names that are very easy to say and spell. My older daughter is Kate, and my younger daughter is Jackie. You’d have to try to get these names wrong. This was an intentional choice on my part—overall, people should just be more conscious of getting other’s names right, but the truth is that they often aren’t. I didn’t want my kids to have to deal with the unpleasant feelings of people not taking the time to get their names correct, and I also didn’t want them to have to deal with the logistics of constantly fixing it. So, I went down the path of choosing something simple for my kids.
I hope they grow up to like and appreciate their names. Like my parents did with Brigette, I chose Kate and Jackie with a lot of intention—to be strong monikers to carry them from babyhood to adulthood.
But Maybe an Easy-to-Pronounce Name Won’t Matter As Much for Their Generation
I’m a product of the ’80s, and where I grew up, it seemed less common to have a more original or unique name—there were often several of the same name in a class from year to year (ahem, Jessica, Jennifer, and Ashley). Now, it seems more likely for parents to choose distinctive names, so my daughters maybe wouldn’t have the same issues growing up that I did if their names were difficult to spell and pronounce. Maybe they will grow up feeling the opposite of me and wish their names weren’t so basic. And maybe if they have children one day, they’ll incorporate these feelings from their personal experiences in how they choose to name their babies. Everyone’s individual lived experiences guide the choices we make further down the road.
Whether you go with a more distinctive name for your child or something more simple, you can’t go wrong because it’s chosen out of love. No matter what your name is, it is a special and unique part of you. And always take the time to learn someone’s name properly—it’s important to them!
Brigette Marshall, Contributing Writer
Brigette is a mom of two little girls and works full-time in project management, both at home and in the office. She loves book clubbing, antique shopping, watching documentaries, and convincing her husband to cook gourmet meals for her.