I recently turned 40, and while I toasted and cheered with friends and family, I found myself also doing the cliché: looking at myself a bit closer in the mirror. Where did those wrinkles come from? Has my skin always looked this dull and crepe-y? Do I now have, gasp, mature skin?!
It is true that my skin has been changing. There was no doubt about it, and my daily makeup just wasn’t working anymore. I wouldn’t consider myself super high maintenance, but my consistent routine of tinted moisturizer, brow tint and gel, blush, and mascara was as sacred as it was steady.
So I booked a makeup lesson for myself. I was expecting to learn some must-do self-care tips that would make me radiate like a hot young influencer, to help detract from the fact that I was getting older. Instead, I found myself on a rainy Sunday afternoon, tears gathering in the corners of my (bright and made-up eyes), as a lovely makeup artist spoke truths that I obviously needed to hear.
“You are beautiful. You want to see yourself the way other people see you.”
And with her wise words and skillful hands, she helped me do just that over the next couple of hours. Here’s what I learned—and what I bought—for my new over-40 makeup routine.
You May Also Like:
- The Ultimate 5-Minute Makeup Routine for Moms
- Dry Skin Survival Guide: The Best Products to Buy Now
- The Best Makeup Routine for Your 30s, According to Experts
Why I decided it was time for a fresh makeup look
I experienced a reckoning as I entered this new decade—I felt the desire to take better care of myself. As I left the uber-demanding toddler years, I was finally able to put more time and energy into both my happiness and health. I wanted a little “glow up” of sorts. Finally, I was ready to focus on myself, starting with my everyday makeup look, so that I could positively approach every day.
“I was ready and finally able (as I left the uber-demanding toddler years) to put more time and energy into both my happiness and health.”
I have found that one of the best ways to create new habits is with a partner, someone to hold you accountable. There was no one else to do this with than my dear friend Lindsay, a fellow new-40-year-old determined to better herself as well. So we booked an appointment with a makeup artist, who would consult and teach us her ways so we could look and feel our best.
Finding the right makeup artist
Brianne Parks has been in the beauty industry for 20+ years. She’s worked in corporate at Sephora, and then MAC Cosmetics Corporate in an Artist Training role before moving on to Origins. She eventually entered the freelance world, creating beauty trainings for Make Up For Ever, Dior, and Bobbi Brown. Today, she does event makeup as well as one-on-one (or groups!) consults and lessons to help women create customized beauty looks that work for them, in person and via Zoom.
Brianne Parks, Makeup Artist and Beauty Educator
With over 20 years of beauty industry experience, Brianne is dedicated to helping women create customized beauty looks that work for them. She’s worked corporate at Sephora, and then MAC Cosmetics Corporate in an Artist Training role, before moving onto Origins. Eventually, she entered the freelance world, creating beauty trainings for Make Up For Ever, Dior, and Bobbi Brown. Today she does event makeup as well as one-on-one (or groups!) consults and lessons.
As women age and enter their 40’s, she sees the common culprits of mature skin: fine lines, dryness, and some loss of volume. But she is also not lamenting it all.
“Please don’t get hung up on a chronological number. I’m turning 43 this year, and I have a lot of appreciation for being here. Sexiness, beauty, and confidence come from within, and I hope all women can tap into that,” says Bri.
Bri joked that she was half makeup artist, half therapist, and it made us feel more comfortable with someone we had only just met getting to know us in such a personal way. There’s no denying that our confidence is boosted when we look our best, and it was with that mentality that Lindsay and I entered Bri’s studio.
Embracing our natural appearance after 40
Immediately upon starting our consultation, both of us launched into a diatribe of all the things that were “wrong” with us, from the appearance of crow’s feet to melasma and a bevy of other fun side effects of daring to get older. Our focus immediately went to what we needed to conceal, to hide.
“One of the things I hadn’t anticipated? Learning about our positive physical attributes and how to highlight them instead of spending so much time and energy figuring out what to cover up,” says Lindsay. And while we learned plenty (more to come on that), there was one singular phrase that kept coming up over and over again: Less is more.
“One of the things I hadn’t anticipated? Learning about our positive physical attributes and how to highlight them instead of spending so much time and energy figuring out what to cover up.”
“Less is more, even when you’re 30+. The dark and heavy eye makeup, higher coverage foundations and concealers, and overpowering dark lipsticks work less well as we get older,” says Bri. “The ‘going out’ makeup we were wearing in our 20s is going to look dated for a variety of reasons; imagine wearing the same outfit out from 20 years ago…it’s going to look dated, too!”
Moisturizer and eye cream = the foundation
With that in mind, Lindsay and I each took turns in the hot seat and learned how to work magic with little effort, what is most important to highlight and focus on, and what products are non-negotiables.
First and foremost, before even a drop of makeup touched our faces, Bri applied moisturizer and eye cream and began professing the value of good skincare. From hydration and moisturizing to finding a great dermatologist and a rich eye cream that works for you, skincare is the foundation for good makeup.
While a splurge, this eye cream comes highly recommended. However, Bri emphasized the most important thing is to find an eye cream that works for you.
Use this daily face cream as a first hydration step before applying makeup.
Use concealer in a new way
With our base all set (and notes to ask about lasers and retinol options at my next derm appointment), Bri used a big fluffy makeup brush for concealer and, as if she were a painter, just dotted it on any red areas on our faces. A big fan of Sephora’s #64 brush, she used it “as an eraser,” dotting where needed, always able to add more if desired. She used MAC Pro Longwear Concealer on both Lindsay and me, in different shades, and swore by their versatility and wearability.
In recent years, I’ve avoided using under-eye concealer because I’ve found that it creases and looks almost worse than none, after only a couple of hours. But Bri claimed that it didn’t need to be the case. She recommended the MAC Concealer we’d be using all over, as well as the Bobbi Brown Skin Concealer Stick, and advised us to get as close as possible to my eyes, tapping the product on with a brush, no rubbing or smashing it in.
The real game-changer? Apply concealer to your top eyelid as well. It instantly woke us up, brightening our faces.
Consider skipping the powder and primer
When asked about primer and powder, Bri was hesitant, saying that these products often feel like extra work, unnecessary steps. If powder is truly needed, use a finely milled powder and apply lightly to your t-zone, being careful not to take away shine where you actually want it (your cheeks!). And never, ever put powder under those now-bright eyes.
“I was shocked to learn how few products could make such a difference to my overall facial appearance. Maybe it’s spending too much time online, but I assumed going into this that I would be learning a multi-layered routine that included at least five steps to prep my skin before applying anything,” said Lindsay.
Fluff up brows to look more youthful
Next up were our brows.
“Fluffed up brows are youthful!” said Bri, and so, using micro-sized brow tools (for better control and precision), she added little strokes upwards, making little hairs as needed to fill out and fluff up our individual brow shapes.
“Brows frame and shape the whole face,” says Bri, so for Lindsay’s already thicker, lush brows, she just added a bit here and there. For me, with thinner, sparser brows, Bri added much more, using Glossier’s Boy Brow Arch.
Looking lit from within was easier than I thought
With our faces fresh and our brows in place, it was time for blush and bronzer.
“Blush makes the face light up,” said Bri, and light up we did, thanks to Fenty Beauty’s Cream Blush, in the crowd-pleasing “Strawberry Drip” shade. It looked bright in the container but came across as sheer and buildable on our cheeks. Bri loaded a brush the same way as she did the concealer, and applied it like “a whisper” across our cheeks.
When she whipped out Fenty Beauty’s Match Stix Matte Contour Skinstick, both Lindsay and I balked a bit. We’ve seen all those TikToks of fresh-faced 20-somethings contouring their faces in scary ways; it all seemed overwhelming and not realistic for our busy mornings getting kiddos out the door. But Bri calmed our nerves, swearing by this product, which can act like both a bronzer and a contour stick. The Amber shade worked for us both, applied with a fluffy brush “where the sun hits,” versus using it as a contour tool and applying it “in the shadows.”
While using it as a contour tool still seems a bit tricky for me (I’d need more practice), the glow it gives as a bronzer is shocking. I look lit from within, with no sun damage needed.
Lip liner? Yes!
Another surprise lesson: lip liner.
Bri lightly lined our lips and then—just as lightly—filled them in with the same product, in shades that she worked tirelessly to find for our individual coloring. “It’s essential to find the right tone,” she says. “If you don’t have the right tone, it can age you, change how people read you.”
When lining lips, she recommends following your natural lip line, trying to achieve balance. To enhance, if you’d like to, add a little volume by going beyond your natural lip line a bit, especially under the middle part of your lips.
Another option: add a slightly darker shade over the lining, focusing on the center, for even more definition. Top off with a bit of gloss in the middle of your lips; no need to smear it all over.
Apply mascara intentionally (and don’t forget your eyelash curler!)
Last but not least, curl those lashes, and slowly, intentionally, apply mascara. Holding the wand more vertically than horizontally can help you hit every lash from a better angle.
For everyday wear, Bri doesn’t typically do shadow or liner; with concealer on our top eyelid and well-placed mascara, our eyes looked bright and awake, without any more effort or products purchased (win-win). Side note, though: if you want a little eye shadow color, grab the go-to Fenty Beauty Contour Skinstick, and apply all over your lids!
That ‘before & after’ feeling
Lindsay and I sat back and took in our fresh faces, bright eyes, and glowy, flushed cheeks. It had been a wonderful experience, and to say we had learned a lot was an understatement. We still looked very much like ourselves. Just brighter, more awake, almost like we had just returned from the best spa out there, after a week of solid sleep. We saw ourselves in the most beautiful light, the way others see us. As we left Bri’s studio, there is no denying we walked with an extra skip in our step as well, and that has carried over to today, weeks later.
“There’s something to be said for looking and feeling your best and how that can impact not only your mood but your productivity. Splashing your face with water is a great way to feel more awake in the morning, but being able to catch a glimpse of said face in the mirror and not shudder at the person in the reflection is a pick-me-up I didn’t anticipate,” said Lindsay. “So much of motherhood is reconciling the person you once were with who you are now, and it’s amazing how a swipe of contour stick and a little lipliner can help heal the psyche.”
Feeling confident over 40
Lindsay and I continue to send each other selfies, showing off our new skills with the bronzer and blush, implementing all our newfound knowledge at home easily, beaming into our phone’s cameras as we snap a quick pic before the day’s chaos begins. Step one of our 40’s “glow up” feels pretty darn successful and was the confidence boost we needed to keep going on our mission to take care of ourselves.
As mothers, self-care often falls to the lowest point on the priority list with all of the things we have to do and think about on a daily basis. So many of us are looking for ways to recharge in order to be our best selves for our families. Giving yourself the gift of an experience like a makeup lesson at age 40 can be the perfect way to celebrate entering your next decade of life. It’s also a great time to do something that is truly for yourself and not your children.
And doing so with a girlfriend—well, it doesn’t get any better.
“There’s no one like your girlfriends to help lift your spirits when you’re feeling a little blah,” says Lindsay. “After all, we are the first ones to dole out compliments to our friends, but also to be our own worst critics. This experience allowed us to hype each other up and spend a few hours away from our families learning a new skill (the shopping spree afterward didn’t hurt either).”
Liz Greene, Contributing Writer
Liz is a lifestyle writer living on the East Coast with her husband and three little boys. Her days are filled with endless messes, tons of cold coffee, Post-It notes transcribed with everything she’s worried she’ll forget, and lots and lots of baby wipes—and she wouldn’t have it any other way. Liz was previously an editor at Style Me Pretty.
Lindsay Scouras, Contributing Writer
Lindsay is a marketing and communications pro and freelance writer based in Rhode Island. As a full-time working mom of two sweet ginger kids, she spends her days answering questions about where her children’s red hair came from (spoiler alert: she has no idea). She is constantly trying to find balance between her day job, parenthood, creative aspirations, decorating her 100-year old colonial, and passion for all things Hollywood and celeb gossip. A New England native, she loves exploring all the charming destinations that the Northeast has to offer with her history-loving husband.
